The Road to an Abundant Life...

A huge part of taking care of ourselves is learning to be introspective.  We spend a lot of time critiquing the actions of others, but I wonder have we spent any time looking at ourselves.  Evaluating our own behavior and measuring it against the word of God is essential for our spiritual growth.  

When you take the time to look at your part in an offense or in a situation - you grow.  I am appreciative of those who would call me on behavior that is outside of the parameters of God’s word.  We all need friends who will hold us accountable.

“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.  See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting”  -Psalm 139:23-24

I have grown so much in the last year.  I have reclaimed my time in huge ways.  Joy has been re-birthed within me and I am working my way to complete wellness.  It has been a journey filled with tears and pain but every last bit of it was necessary for me to lean how to live again.  I had to dig, crawl and scrape for every inch to get myself out of the pit I called life.  I am a living witness that you can have breath in your body and be dead at the same time.

I am still on a journey.  Getting better day by day.  My mind, body and soul suffered trauma and so I had to set myself on a course to repair all three.  

Mind - I started seeing a therapist.  Now I know many believe that we should be able to just pray everything out.  We can, but I am a firm believer that God blesses us with tools that are meant to be used.  Just as we go to the doctor when we are suffering in our body, we can also go to the doctor/therapist when we are suffering in our mind.  For me,  the Word of God always trumps everything.  I take what is useful  and leave the rest.  So far the tools I’ve been given have been invaluable and I’m thankful for the continued journey.

Body - Now I am not one who obsess over size or the scale.  I believe that body positivity is key in how you see yourself.  My confidence has never been determined by my size.  I will say, however, I have uncovered my unhealthy relationship with things that I consume, and it’s negative impact on my overall energy and stamina.  Having a consistent workout routine and honoring the commitment to this kind of self care has been a life saver. Adding regular exercise has freed me more than I care to admit.  Like, I could have been doing this all along.  Crazy how we can get stuck.  Pray for me as I journey on.

Soul - Spending time with God is something I have always done.  I have always carved out time to spend with the Lord.  If I hadn’t I would probably be dead by now, perhaps at my own hand.  I will say that living in a state of severe sadness and depression makes you numb to life.  The only way I was able to survive and actually function in this state for so long was that I walked with a promise keeping God.  He never left me, nor did He forsake me.  I could easily encourage others while I myself was drowning.  I look back now and realize God literally carried me for like 27 years.  Insane.  Forgiving myself for allowing myself to live in this state for so long was my first order of business.  Once I did that (and I still have minor relapses), I was able to move forward and begin to do the spiritual work necessary to get me back on track.  Spending time in the presence of God in devotion, prayer and worship is the highest form of self care!

I am here to tell you today that you can LIVE.  I mean really live.  God promises us an abundant life, the question is are we willing to live it.  I pray that by sharing the experiences on my journey it will encourage someone else to self evaluate and make the necessary adjustments to live the abundant life God promised us.   If we are not living abundantly then it has everything to do with the choices we are making.  

We can do all things though Christ who gives us strength.  Let’s all live the abundant life God has promised us,  together.

PREPARATION TIME

Every now and then we all need a revival. Lord knows I need one in this season of my life.  Life circumstances gave me a beating last year and although I am on the other side of it - it left me with some pretty significant battle scars and woulds that need to be tended to. 

I thank God for restoring joy in my life, but recognize that in order for me to continue to heal, I must put in the work on my physical, mental and spiritual self.  To live the full life of abundance God has promised requires action on my part.  I’m sure many of you can relate.

Jesus was led by the spirit into the desert and spent 40 days in a time preparation, enduring temptation by satan. After that time he began to preach, gather disciples and perform miracles:

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.” Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.” Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. “If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written: “He will command his angels concerning you, and they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.” Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.” Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor.  “All this I will give you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.” Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only.” Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him. Matthew 4:1-11

Just as Jesus did during his 40 days of temptation, let us directly respond to satan with the Word of God. What a perfect time for us to enter into a season of 40 days of reflection and instruction to allow ourselves to be prepared and equipped for whatever God has for us. It is a perfect opportunity for us to fully commit to renewing our mind, body and spirit.  

Jesus fasted for those 40 days. I know the most common fast is that of food, but I encourage you to choose something, whether it be food, social media, television, etc. that is distracting or tempting you to stray form the narrow road and eliminate it. Use the time you would normally spend on that thing and redirect that focus on to God. Be ready to receive from Him everything you need.

Starting Wednesday, February 26, extending through April 9, I will be walking through a devotional entitled, “40 Days on the Narrow Road” by Dr. Barry Settle. I love the title of this devotional as it reminded me that the goal is to stay on the narrow road.  If I’m honest, when the storms of life rage, I sometimes find myself veering off mighty close to the edge of the road.  This is where satan would have us stay, but God makes all things new. He can and will restore the joy of our salvation, providing a course correction back to the narrow road He would have us travel on.

God can perform the miracle of resurrection in our lives at any time, but let’s use this time to jump start our journey together as we are led by God, our creator and our father.  It is my desire that this 40 day period will strengthen us as we seek to walk on the narrow road that leads to Christ. 

The devotional is available HERE on Amazon kindle book and HERE amazon paperback book.

Each day we will read the devotional, pray for understanding and instruction and journal our thoughts, prayers and lessons learned for the day. Journaling is the tool that allowed me to reclaim my joy in Christ. You can read all about it (here) - hyperlink journaling to joy. 

Praying that during this time God resurrects the things in your life that should be living and thriving but that are currently dead. 

THE GROWING DEVALUATION OF DISCOURSE

One could blame social media for the current state of public engagement but I don’t believe the argument holds.  Behind the keystrokes are individuals who are expressing points of view.  Social media then becomes just another avenue by which we can have discussions. Regardless of the form of expression, the words we speak or write are indelible and as the Bible tells us, have the power to give life or death.

Social media has made it possible to have a wide reach of connectivity with others.  That level of interaction should evoke an even greater responsibility.  What is missing in most conversations whether in person or online is civility and a general respect for a difference of opinion. What signifies civility seems to be largely subjective, but I think we can agree that name calling and intentional degrading of a person because of their differing opinion would fall within the scope.  

I love good debate and generally have an appreciation for the how  various points of view are argued.  But as a Christian looking through the lens of the Gospel we see that the Bible has much to say to us about what flows from our mouth.  Debate is fine, just proceed with the following in mind:

Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.    Colossians 3:8

From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. James 3:10

A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit. Proverbs 15:4

It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person. Matthew 15:11

While some prefer to take the path of least resistance, I believe that meaningful debate is valuable.  It evokes thought and allows us to reason together. We should be intentional and selective about the conversations and discussions to which we enter.  Sometimes it is prudent to start a discussion or comment on a pre-existing discussion and sometimes it is not.  It is unfortunate however, when we shy away from a discussion because it has the potential to lead to contention or controversy.  If either arise we should meet them with grace, a gentle tongue, and with the ultimate goal of making our point clear while leaving folks with their dignity and the relationship one to another in tact.  

THE SYSTEMATIC DISMANTLING OF MERITOCRACY IN THE WORKPLACE

I am under no illusion that life is fair, especially in the workplace.   I do, however, believe that the first shall be last and the last shall be first. 

I have spent the past 26 years as a civil servant.  I knew from the very early stages of my employment that the job structure, promotional ladder and general work culture was prohibitive of original and progressive thought, so I decided long ago to approach my employment solely as a means to an end.  

I simply work to finance my life which has alway been separate and apart from the workplace.  It is for me as it is for many, that the depth and breadth of my and so many other’s gifts and abilities would be lost on such a restrictive and oppressive work culture.   It is a space where voices are  muted and visionary aspirations are suppressed.

Any idea that would dare to approach the boundary lines of the proverbial  “box” has been killed in action - or should I say has fallen victim to the premeditative actions of those who seek to murder it.

I have watched  leadership drain the life out of those in the workplace who dare to dream and believe the impossible can be accomplished.  They are dream killers - the ones who know that they cannot begin to be positive change agents so they block your every attempt at trying to do so.  By the way, those people - the ones with the skill, professional knowledge, and documented exemplary work product -  the think outside of the box folk - they are the ones that do not get promoted.  

I have witnessed people with little experience,  narrow focus, little to no creativity and a mediocre skill set at best be promoted over progressive, articulate, creative minded visionaries all because leadership is looking for yes people who will stroke their ego and do as they are told with little to no push back - even if the push back is warranted for the greater good of the organization or company.

To those people I say,  that the respect of your peers and your subordinates ( i loathe that word by the way but it seems to get the job done in this context so I’m going to roll with it) is far greater than any promotion. I say that fully understanding the career and financial implications, however, sometimes the tangible is not as meaningful as the intangible. 

As I have conversations with people that work in a wide range of industries in the public and private sector, they are reporting similar experiences.  The vacation of promotion based on merit is widespread and acquiesces to the ego and hidden agendas of those who are charged with making the decisions. 

To all of you who are struggling in the workplace, who are being supervised and dictated to by dream killers, who are dealing with the micro aggressions committed by those who believe they have power over you , who work tirelessly and receive no recognition for your efforts - my message to you is to continue to do the same exemplary work that, by all reasonable standards, should have earned you the respect, promotion and recognition that you are due.

For promotion and power come from nowhere on earth, but only from God.  He promotes one and deposes another.  Seek out ones in leadership positions who are the visionaries and progressive in thought.  Work as if working unto the Lord and not man. Continue to be honorable in your actions, and maintain a servant leadership mentality.  You can lead from any position, so lead from where you are and own your sense of responsibility within the sphere of your influence. 

You may feel overlooked and unappreciated but remember that The LORD is watching everywhere, keeping his eye on both the evil and the good. God requires us to act justly, to love mercy and to walk humbly with Him.  Fulfill those requirements in your workplace as you deal with others.  Keep pressing and receive your validation and worth from God, the one who created you and who gives you strength. 

SPENDING, LOW BUY & STEWARDSHIP

My focus for 2020 is stewardship.  In last week’s post (which I will link here) I made a commitment to the careful and responsible management of everything God has entrusted to my care.  One of the areas I am going to give special devotion and attention to in my all inclusive stewardship journey is finance.  I must admit that finance has always been something I struggled to properly manage.  I am blessed to make a good income that is sufficient to allow me to live a very comfortable life, enjoying the not only the things I need in the form of basic necessities, but also things I want.  That being said, I never really had an intentionally constructed plan for my earnings.  I basically took my income, paid bills, saved a little for a rainy day and spent the remainder on whatever I wanted. I’m here to tell you that this is not a sustainable plan.

I have been through many iterations of responsibility in my spending over the years.  As I have gotten older my spending has moved somewhat away from material possessions and more toward spending money on experiences that provide value that I can share with family and friends.   

I wrote a blog post about decluttering my life.  You can hear all about it here.   I shared that as I began the process I was faced with all the stuff I had accumulated over the years.   It was both overwhelming and revelational.  All of the stuff that I decided to purchase was weighing me down.  After getting rid of about 50% of my things and realizing that I still had a mountain of material possessions was shocking. I am still working on it.

As I embark upon this stewardship journey, I am approaching finance from a spiritual standpoint, and in so doing had to evaluate my heart as to the motivation of my spending.  Matthew 6:19-21 spoke to me so clearly: 

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.  But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”  -Matthew 6:19-21

I was consistently spending money on things, so what did that say about my heart?  I was so convicted about my spending to the point of action. For me, It was not about not having enough money to purchase an item.  It is more about assessing why I had a desire to spend money on something that does not ultimately provide any lasting impactful value to my life.

Now I know some of you are thinking,  “I can purchase things and still have a heart for serving others”.  You may be correct, but after careful consideration of my motivation, I am committing to an intentional turning away of purchasing material things and toward spending to providing resources to help others.

While in general, I don’t believe there is anything wrong with spending on yourself and buying things you want in moderation if you can afford it. But this commitment I’ve made to living a life within an overall context of stewardship has caused me to take a deeper, more introspective look into why I desire to purchase things in the first place.  I am committed to moving away from a what can I purchase next for myself mindset towards who can I help next with what God has blessed me with.  

I am doing the following to reach my goal of stewardship in the area of finance:

1. Being grateful for what I already have - When I take stock of what I already have in my possession I find that it is enough and it will minimize the obsession with wanting more.

2. I compiled a list of what I value and then looked at that list through the lens of the Gospel. I started with that Matthew scripture I referenced earlier.

3. I’ve committed to a “Low Buy” practice by being intentional about every purchase I consider making. No more mindless spending.  I am now asking myself is the purchase I’m making adding real value to my life and is it in line with the goals I’ve set for my life?  If the answer is no, I am not making the purchase.

4. I am making a commitment to honor the budget I’ve created for myself. Operating within a budget is a powerful tool to keep spending in perspective.  Prayerfully considered line items in outside of the necessities, I believe, will prove to be useful in 

I pray that sharing my commitment to being a better steward in the area of finance encourages you to do the same.  If you are on a similar journey please share in the comments so that we can all grow together.

STEWARDSHIP - NEW YEAR FOCUS 2020

Every year I like to choose a focus word that helps me frame my habits and practices in the new year.  Most are things I have already started working on but want to drill down on ensuring my success in those areas.  While you don’t have to wait for a new year to embark on something new, it is nice to take a retrospective look at the past year’s lessons and look forward to what is to come in the new year.

2019 was a rough year for me.  It was full of revelation, disappointment, self discovery and pain - all of which I am thankful for because all of it  paved the road back to joy and peace in my life.  Tried in the fire, out as pure gold as they say.  If I am honest, I still regret some of the life decisions I’ve made, but one will go insane constantly looking back(just ask Lot’s wife) and longing for what was missing.  So, I have learned to focus on the things I do have as opposed to the things I don’t, and while I have made vast improvements in this area I am nowhere close to where I need to be.  The journey continues.

In an attempt to move toward my goal of living a life of gratitude, my focus word for 2020 is stewardship.  I commit to the  careful and responsible management of what God has entrusted to my care.  It is my desire to live an all inclusive life of stewardship.  I have been blessed with so much and realize that dwelling on what I don’t have is ingratitude.  When I say, “things” I am not speaking of material things.  I strive to be a better steward focussing more closely on the following areas:  Finance, Spiritual Gifts, Service to Others, and Gratitude.

Finance - I commit to being a better steward of the monetary resources God has blessed me with so that I can do more for those who have been cast aside, overlooked and marginalized by society.  I don’t know about you but I want to do more.  

Spiritual Gifts - I commit to using the gifts of the spirit that God has bestowed upon me to bless others, lift up the name of Jesus and prayerfully lead folk to Christ.  I need to do more.

Service to Others - I commit to spend more time in service to others.  Feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, and actively engaging in mission work on a consistent basis.  I know I can do more and commit to doing so.

Gratitude - I commit to an intentional mind shift away from regret and towards gratitude.  Whatever state I am in, I will meditate on the enormous blessings God has afforded me.  

Matthew 25:14-30 is the passage of scripture I will be focusing on to be a constant reminder of tending to the blessed resources God has provided.  Reexamining the parable of the talents has been a sobering reminder of the consequence of idleness in the kingdom.  You can read the passage here. 

What is your focus word for the coming year? What call to action have you made for your life?  I would love for you to share so that we might encourage one another in our pursuits.  It is my prayer that we all grow, reach set goals and take care of one another. 

May God continue to bless and keep you.

PAPER SUNDAY JOURNAL

This is a beautiful personalized journal offering by Paper Sunday. The title page of each journal is personalized with the name of your choice. A scripture appears at the bottom of every other page with your name or name of your choice inserted into the body of the scripture. I believe that this personalization impresses upon the reader, the personal relevance of the scripture to their lives.

i recently wrote a post about my journal and notebook picks for 2020. My choices have not changed, however, when I received this journal I decided to find a way to incorporate it into my journaling routine.

I’ve decided to use this journal as somewhat of a notebook to keep sermon and bible study notes, along with jotting down my thoughts and revelations about the scripture printed on the page.

You certainly don’t have to purchase gifts. In fact, I find the most meaningful and precious gifts cannot be purchased. However, if you are purchasing gifts this season and are looking for a impactful gift, this journal would be a wonderful choice. There is no greater gift than the gift of the Gospel. You can purchase the journal here.

My 2020 Journal & Notebook Picks

An integral part of my self care routine is journaling and brain dumping. I posted a You Tube video and blog post describing how I journaled my way back to joy. You can read and view it here. Writing is something that I do to maintain a healthy mental and emotional mind set.

Below I am sharing my journal and notebook picks for 2020. Along with journaling I also conduct daily “brain dumps’ where I write down everything that is in my head.

The new year is fast approaching and that means it is time for a new journal. Last year I used a beautiful journal gifted to me by my eldest daughter. This year I opted for this beautiful journal from Anthropologie. I love Anthropologie’s clothing and home decor, but did you know they also have a great selection of beautiful journals, notebooks and planners? I am really looking forward to writing in this journal.

This journal comes in multiple colors and is made from a beautiful suede material. You can purchase it here.

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I saw this daily journal and decided to pick it up. The title struck me - “Calm the Chaos” A daily practice for a more peaceful life. Pictured below is the inside of the journal.

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I approach journaling from the standpoint of pouring my heart out on the page, so I rarely find myself void of something to write. I much prefer a blank journal with space to write only, however, I love these prompts! I do not see myself answering the questions to these prompts each day, but I do think they are great questions to consider and ponder daily. I will be gifting this particular journal, but will use its contents for daily reflection and preparation for the coming day. You can purchase this journal here.

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The contents of my journal are private and deeply personal. For that reason I do not typically take my journal with me when I leave the house. When I am on the go I use a jotting notebook to record my thoughts. I also use a jotting notebook for brain dumps. For me, brain dumps are very different than journaling. I journal primarily about my feelings and my thoughts about the day or anything I am currently struggling or dealing with. When I brain dump, I write down everything that is on my mind as it relates to all aspects of my life. I write down business ideas, blog ideas, personal and professional goals, home projects, wardrobe additions or deletions, and the list goes on. Anything that is on my mind, I write down during a brain dumping session. This practice allow me to clear my mind. Performing brain dumps throughout the day and just before bed allows me to rest more easily.

I record these brain dumps in a notebook that I take with me on the go. This year I used a combination of a notebook that I purchased at Target and the Graphic Image notebook. Normally, the Graphic Image notebook is my goto, however, I wanted to try a notebook that is bound and not a spiral so that it would fit more easily with the planer I carry every day. I saw this 3 pack set of GORGEOUS notebooks at Anthropologie and could not resist using them as my jotting notebooks in 2020. I could not find these particular notebooks online but they are currently being sold in store if you want to pick some up.

I keep a separate notebook on my desk for my daily devotion and Bible study notes. I am still contemplating what notebook to use. I do have a journaling Bible but need additional space to write.

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Well, these are my picks for 2020. Please remember that you do not have to purchase intricate or pricey journals and notebooks to do the essential thing which is to actually write. Make purchases that fit into your budget. You can be just as effective using a $1 composition notebook. Stay tuned in the new year for more journal and brain dumping posts. These two practices have saved my life and I cannot advocate for it enough.

What journals and/or notebooks do you intend to use in 2020? I would love to hear your picks.

Gratitude

“Gratitude turns what we have into enough".

I love this quote as it has changed my entire mindset about being thankful. We often focus on what we do not yet posses instead of being thankful for what we already have. If we take a look at what we have we will find that we already have so much.

I pray that your Thanksgiving was blessed and that you were surrounded by those you love and those that love you.

Blessings,

Marsha

Getting Rid Of It

Several months ago I made the decision to declutter my life. This process started with an emotional declutter and then moved to the decluttering of my physical space. All of the stuff I was holding on to was weighing me down. The more stuff I had the more I had to organize and make room for. It was a vicious cycle that I had to break free from. I am at the beginning of my decluttering journey and still have a very long way to go, but I've started and it has made a major impact on my life already.

Whatever exists in your life that is hindering you or weighing you down, make the choice to eliminate it from your life. As always pray before you move.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. - Hebrews 12:1

Five Scriptures That Changed My Mindset

These 5 scriptures are scriptures that I repeat as affirmations each day. They have shaped my mindset and move be back in alignment when I have moved out of step.
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Philippians 4:6
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me

Romans 8:38-39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a]neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

​John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

KNOW YOUR ENEMY

The enemy (the devil) comes to steal kill and destroy. Not something I just learned or was informed of, but it is quite devastating to see the enemy in action. The devil is quite cunning and crafty. I mean, I pray and do my daily devotions and consider myself, while quite flawed, to be in tune with the Word of God. All that said, the devil still, on occasion, manages to slip into areas of my life, do his dirt and leave me looking around like what just happened? The devil’s assignment is to steal, kill and destroy. he uses our emotions, and insecurities to carry it out. Unfortunately, when we do not respond to his tactics with the Word of God we are left defenseless and he wins the battle. Just do not let him win the war. I’ve lost several battles but I will not ever concede the war......You shouldn’t either.


STEAL
to take without permission or legal right and without intending to return it

When the devil steals he steals for keeps - and is incapable of returning what he stole because what he took is not of him. he does not possess it. Only God can restore the things of God which He placed inside of us. The devil comes for our peace and hope. he is a worthy adversary. Don’t sleep on him. If you are not vigilant he will rob you blind and leave you a wreck. Put on the whole armor of God and be prayerful. The attack is coming. Do your level best to be ready.


KILL
put an end to or cause the failure or defeat of (something)
cause the death of (a person, animal, or other living thing

The devil’s goal is to crush us, leaving us without hope. he seeks to cause death in every area of our lives. Death to friendships, marriages, families - relationships. Loving our neighbor is a command from God and the devil does everything he can to destroy it. You not forgiving your neighbor is the key strategy. Unforgiveness ensures death. Ask the savior to aid you in forgiving those who have offended and hurt you or else the enemy will have won.


DESTROY
put an end to the existence of (something) by damaging or attacking it
ruin (someone) emotionally or spiritually
defeat (someone) utterly

The devil does not just want to steal from us and kill us, he wants to utterly destroy us. he wants us to down for the count and never get up. If he can keep us in a defeated state then we cannot live our lives in the freedom that Christ provides and ultimately cannot be good witnesses for Christ.
God has already defeated the devil. When we are operating in a weekend state we are vulnerable to the actions of the enemy and often fall prey to the devil’s assignment.
I have had a myriad of revelations over the few months or so, many of which were devastating. Those revelations necessitated action, and the kind of action to be taken required careful, thoughtful and prayerful consideration. The devil tried his best to continue to use my emotions and my propensity for excessive reasoning to keep me in a holding pattern, but God is all about breakthroughs. He breaks the power of sin and all things that seek to keep us bound. He will absolutely do the same for you. When you understand your enemy you can more readily recognize his schemes. Stand on the Word of God and believe what it says. Everything that seeks to destroy you has ben conquered by Christ. Ride the storm and allow God to navigate.
We cannot survive an attack nor launch a successful counter attack against the devil in our own strength. If we try we will ultimately fail. Resist the devil and he will flee. Resisting means doing things God way and with His spirit. Pray without ceasing and know the truth of the Gospel so that when you are told otherwise you can recognize the lie.

MY JOY

Hurt will inevitably cause you to hurt others. It took me a long time to recognize that I had been hurt for a long time. I am a prime example of a person who operated for years in a constant state of brokenness, just existing while allowing God to sustain me. As unintentional as it was, not having what I so desperately needed caused me to hurt others. I lost sight of what should be the source of my happiness, and instead looked for fulfillment, happiness and joy from others. When relying upon others to supply your happiness, hurt and disappointment are inevitable. I received very little of what I needed to be happy from the people I wanted to receive it from that it catapulted me into a perpetual state of unhappiness. In all honesty, unhappiness is something that I can deal with, but when my joy left I knew I had to make a change.


“Psychology Today” describes happiness as a state of well being that encompasses living a good life - that is with a sense of meaning and deep satisfaction.


I have learned that happiness is external. It is predicated upon situations, other people, events and things. My happiness was dependent upon the alignment of my expectations with what actually occurred in my life. If those two things didn’t align, I was unhappy. That realization was huge for me so let me restate it. If what I wanted or thought should happen did not happen in the manner in which I thought it should then I was unhappy. I was allowing my happiness to be contingent upon external factors that I could not control. Just thinking about it now makes me realize how much precious time I wasted trying to control things I could not control. How exhausting and futile it was.


In stark contrast to happiness, although oftentimes used synonymously, is joy. Joy is not external. Joy is internal. It is not contingent on someone else’s behavior or treatment of you or how things align or don’t align with our expectations. Joy is an intrinsic spiritual quality that comes from Jesus Christ. Joy is the state in which I am determined to live no matter what the circumstance. Even in the midst of unhappiness because of a life event or another person’s actions, I understand now, that it is absolutely possible to still have joy. I was living in a chronic state of unhappiness which I allowed to lead to a snuffing out of my joy.

My chronic unhappiness led to ferocious bouts with depression. I really spiraled downward into a place where I felt devoid of joy. The devil would love for us all to stay here, but God gives us joy! The elders always used to sing, “This joy I have the world didn’t give it, the world can’t take it away”. I thought I understood the words to that song but I did not. Oftentimes we can understand a concept theoretically, but until it is tested in the fire by a profound experience that affects us deeply, we cannot fully understand it and allow it to create lasting change within us.


My joy was restored when I made peace in the acceptance of the things I could not change. Controlling external factors was futile. I’m sure that I may be temporarily unhappy in the future because of one thing or the other, but pray that I never again surrender to a life without joy. I was reminded as I was working through this process that my middle name is Joi. (although spelled with an "i" instead of a 'y" , My father, God rest his soul, would always remind me of why he gave me the middle name of Joi. He said that it was because I brought such joy to their lives, but that it should serve as a reminder that no matter what the circumstance, to not allow anyone to take away my joy, as that is a gift that the Father gives to us so freely. It is amazing what God brings back into your remembrance when you are going through a trial and have lost sight of who you are.
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I reclaimed my joy in the stillness - in those moments alone with the one who created me and loves me best. Now that my joy has been restored I am determined to protect it at all cost. If you have lost your joy, be relentless about reclaiming it. It is a process in which you should focus on yourself and not others. It involves a painstaking look at yourself and your heart. I am striving to always stay in the presence of God, for there can be found, the fullness of joy.

Journaling To Joy

About a year ago, I had reached a time in my life where I had to come to grips with the fact that I was unhappy with my life. In order to turn that around, I needed to take a look inward. Journaling is how I accomplished moving from unhappiness to joy. Joy is something that you should always have. Even in moment of unhappiness you should still posses joy. If you do not, it's time to look inward and run a check.

I deployed a three step process in my journaling to get back to joy:
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1. I poured all of my thoughts and feelings onto the pages of my journal. This allowed me to have an honest conversation with myself.
2. I read aloud what I wrote and looked at those feelings through the lens of the Gospel. This afforded me to the opportunity to run a self assessment as to what was in my heart.
3. I prayed, asking God to heal my heart and remove anything from my heart that was not like Him.

I pray that this helps someone as they struggle through the difficult periods in their life.

PRESENTING THE GOSPEL

I started Modern Day Christian Chick because I wanted to primarily reach out to those who do not believe in Christ. You can read all about how the blog was birthed here. I prayed about the name of the blog for some time. Modern means relating to the present and I felt led to have that word somewhere in the name of my blog. Modern only relates to a present and updated way of presenting the Gospel. The Word of God remains the same and must not be compromised. I strive to model my approach to ministry after that of Jesus - a loving gentle approach to those who are hurting and to those who are unbelievers.


I believe the way we present the Gospel and minister to folk is critical. We have got to move out of the way and allow the Word of God to speak directly to people’s issues and situations. I’m always taken back to the woman at the well and Jesus’ interaction with her there. Here you have a woman who had an issue of promiscuity and infidelity. She was actively living a life that was contrary to the laws of God. Jesus very easily could have admonished the woman pointing out that she was a harlot, running around with several men in a condemning tone. Instead, He told her all about herself while showing His infinite love and redeeming her all at the same time. You can read about it here. That interaction forever changed her heart, and she told many about Jesus and what He had done for her. For me, this is the ultimate model and God has led me into this kind of interaction with folk.


Ive found that removing the judgmental, “preachy” tone (I used to be this person) allows people to arrive at the conclusion that Jesus Christ is the way by seeing how the Gospel speaks to the human condition and has an answer to the malady of our hearts on their own. When folk are in pain, feeling as if all is lost, and they are either a Christian who is struggling with their faith or they don’t believe in God because of the pain they are experiencing, it is not the time to give a full sermonic dissertation on the book of Job. Are the lessons learned in Job beneficial? Yes. Is it appropriate to preach from the book at the moment when someone is pouring out their heart to you?, probably not. Show the compassion of Christ and then as the wound begins to heal begin to gently instruct them in the ways of God found in His word. (The book of Job does this magnificently).


Listen, everyone should operate in the gift of the ministry God has given them. There are some that constantly preach hell and damnation. Some have the ministry style of constant critique and correction as they perpetually tell folk what they are doing wrong. Some quote scripture incessantly with no explanation of how that scripture relates to the human condition or of its relevance to the person’s life. Let me drop an example of something that occurred recently: a few days ago I posted a video on my Instagram. I was sitting in the car before my church service and just felt led to hop on and try to provide a word of encouragement. (So many people in my sphere of influence are currently going through painful and difficult trials and most of them are not Christians). I was saying that no matter what you’ve done or situation you find yourself in you are still God’s child. My point was that even if you don’t believe in Him, understand that He is still your Father and loves and cares for you as His child. I later realized that someone commented on the post with the response that we are not all God’s children although we are created in His image. Sigh..….let me just say that I appreciate the interaction, and I am not arguing the point that was made. In fact, I believe that the person’s assertion is correct, however, what was really the point of the response to a word of encouragement? The children of God are clearly those who believe in Him, but the context in which I was speaking was to ensure that anyone listening would be assured of the fact that God loves them, as their Father. The Gospel should never be compromised in any way, but as in most things, timing and delivery is everything.


I have been blessed to witness many people who would not even entertain the idea of Christ come to know, love and follow Him. One of them is actually a co-worker of mine, who said “there is no way I can walk into a church, Marsha. I’m a straight sinner and I’m fine with that. I’m happy”. I told them that I was a sinner too, and the only difference between me and them is my acknowledgement that I didn’t want to live in that sin anymore and that by accepting Christ and repenting of that sin, I have been forgiven. The fact that they knew that the way they were living was classified as sin told me everything I needed to know to be able to minister to this person. They had a moral compass already. We just had to arrive at the conclusion that it was God who is the moral law giver and then the further discussions flowed from there. They began their journey and I ministered as the holy spirit led, but did not push.


It was a blessing to watch this person come to Christ. After further discussions I learned, as is usually the case, that their problem was not with God or His son Jesus, but with those in the church who had used the Word as a weapon of oppression and legalistic rhetoric as opposed to a tool of liberation for which it was designed. Oh church people, when will we ever get it? You cannot shame folk into salvation. Maybe that approach has worked for some, but based on what I have witnessed it is not effective. Will you spend eternity in hell if you do not accept Christ as your savior? Yes. I am just suggesting that perhaps you not lead with that. It is so beautiful to have a willing heart that loves the Lord, believes in Him and places their trust in Him. It is true that sin separates us from God, but there is absolutely nothing that can separate us from His love. I implore you, lead with love.


To the Christian, I challenge us to always present the case for Christ and His Gospel with gentleness and kindness. Never compromise the message but present it in love.
To the non Christian, I challenge you to always seek truth. Do not discard Christianity because of what some preacher or church person said or did to you. Is the Word of God relatable. Can it answer the philosophical questions that most ask when deciding on a world view. How doe the Word of God address origin, morality, meaning and destiny. What does it say about evil, justice, love and forgiveness. Seek God’s response to these questions and you will find truth. I believe that with just a little bit of faith and an open heart and mind to receive truth, you will find a loving Savior whose Gospel is synonymous with truth. As the old folk always say, you have nothing to loose and everything to gain.


May God bless and keep you…..

RESET

When you’re phone isn’t operating properly, tasks take longer to process, pages load slowly, and sometimes when you try to access apps, the phone crashes and takes you back to the Home page without warning. This is usually a sign that your phone needs to be reset. Sometimes you can get away with simply turning the phone off, leaving it off for a few minutes and when you turn it back on it is functioning properly. Other times the strain on the phone has caused so much damage that the phone must be completely reset and restored to factory settings. And so it has been with my life as of late. Despite my best efforts to perform a soft reboot, I was forced to perform a hard reset.


I have an iPhone, so I don’t know how it works with an android device, but once you have decided that a hard reset is needed, you must select “Erase all content and settings”. The iPhone then asks you to enter your password (I’m assuming because this is such a drastic act, erasing all content, that it wants to make absolutely sure this is what you want to do and to make sure that you are the owner of the device - the owner of the phone is the only one that should be permitted to perform this action). It is a function that requires full commitment.
Once the reset is performed and all content and settings are erased you are then presented with the option to restore the phone from a previous version or to start a new.


Here is what I’ve learned so far……




CHOICES HAVE CONSEQUENCES
It is ill advised to perform a hard reset without consulting the Lord. Making decisions based on emotion is deadly for our souls. Emotions cannot be trusted. They are unstable and fleeting and do not provide a firm and sure foundation upon which to build and support any kind of decision let alone one that may be life altering.


The choice to perform a hard reset must be sanctioned by God for it to yield a beneficial result for your life. In order to be sure before you make that decision you must spend significant time in the presence of God in prayer. Listen to His voice and obey what He says. Allow the choice to be yours and God’s alone. Just you two. When you are emotional you tend to share with others, they in turn share with others and before you know it many people have knowledge of your dilemma and are weighing in. I understand that sometimes we need counsel, but seek that counsel wisely and let the final voice of decision be God’s.




AFTER A RESET IS PERFORMED DO NOT RESTORE FROM A PREVIOUS VERSION
Listen! If you do not hear anything else I’ve said in this blog please hear this. If you look back with a longing for the old version that you just hit the reset button on, you will die. Kinda like Lot’s wife. Remember her? If not, you can read about her here. When God tells you to get up from a place or situation with the intention on destroying a thing in you that is not like Him, GO! This does not always require a physical move but sometimes it is a mind set move. In either case, do not look back longing for what was. God will do a new thing in you and all of that old “stuff” must be destroyed. Putting old wine in new skins is not the move. (If that reference means nothing to you then read about that here). Trust me on this, (or don’t), but I’m telling you, I am a witness to what God will do when you move out of the way and allow HIM to rebuild you and replenish your spirit with His spirit. It is absolutely transformational.
While you may have to perform many hard resets in your life, the goal is to not to have to perform the same hard reset on the same situation.




RESTORE TO FACTORY SETTINGS AND START ANEW
What we choose to load ourselves up with after performing a hard reset will have a significant impact on whether or not we wind up back in the same place that necessitated the reset in the first place. If we allow God to reset us and live within HIS perfectly designed operating system then we will find ourselves living our best life. When we choose to live contrary to God’s precepts it has devastating affects on our lives and the lives of those around us. But because of Jesus, we are able to repent and start a new.


It is God who created us. In HIS image. He manufactured us and placed in us the settings that are like Him. But because of our choices, we oftentimes replace His settings with our own. God help me, I have done it! Those things that we have set in our own lives by operating the way we want to operate instead of how He created us to operate corrupts our system and a hard reset is the only way to course correct. Once the reset button is pushed, do not attempt to live your newly transformed life from a corrupted place.




LIVING THROUGH A HARD RESET
As I live through my hard reset I struggle with Thy will versus my will. Though I am fully aware that God’s will for my life is always better than mine, I still struggle. But as I grow in grace and mature in Him I can readily identify God’s voice over my own as the authority in my life and I am choosing His way. My prayer is that you will so the same.


If you feel as if you need a hard reset, seek God and do what He tells you to do. It is a hard choice to hit the reset button, to wipe out all of those things that you are accustomed to and build from a new place, but it is sometimes necessary to move from a dead place in to a place that is filled with life and peace.


After you hit the reset button, trust God, then take up your bed and walk.....

WELCOME TO MY YOU TUBE CHANNEL

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Blessings,

​Marsha Joi

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// MARSHA JOI
My name is Marsha Joi. Welcome to my life style channel. I am a mother, 911 Dispatch Instructor, Youth Ministry Director and owner of Alpha & Omega Tactical Dispatch, LLC. We train dispatchers and take the public safety model into the private sector. Visit our website to learn more: www.aotcdispartch.com.

THE BLESSING OF FRIENDSHIP

Time is fleeting and our lives can change in the twinkling of an eye. God has given us the gift of life and the beauty of relationship not only with Him but with each other. It is our relationship with each other that is of utmost importance to God. He commands us to love one another.

I am currently navigating some major life changes and it has forced me to take inventory of my life and those things that are most important to me. Life is finite and we have no idea when we will no longer exist in these mortal bodies. The time that I have left I want to spend with people whom I love and doing things that bring me joy. Experiences far outweigh material possessions and sharing those experience with those you hold dear is even more special.

I am on a mission to be intentional about cultivating relationships. I have been blessed with an amazing village of folk I call friends. These are people who love me and I love them. They have been instrumental in my life and in the lives of my children. It is a blessing to know that if my daughters do not feel as if they can talk to me about something, that they are able to go to my friends and receive advice. You cannot just let anyone into your village, especially when you are entrusting them to provide counsel to your children. It was important to surround myself and my children with folk who pray - who love God and will dispense Godly advice.

“He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harms” -Proverbs 13:20

​I share often my struggle with depression and in the past I have allowed the weight of that spirit to prohibit me from spending quality time with my friends and from opportunities to create new relationships. In the last two years I have lost several friends, many of which were younger than me. It reminded me that life is indeed filled with swift transition and we must seize every moment. Theoretically, I knew this, however the realness and finality of their death was sobering and propelled me toward a change in behavior.
I have cleared space in my life to allow for the time needed to cultivate relationships. I now schedule time to spend with my friends and family. I have a monthly Sushi date with some very good girlfriends whom I just happen to work with. Taking the time out to just enjoy the company of my friends has been such a blessing to me. I encourage all of you to do the same. Call a friend who you haven’t spoken to in a while, just to say hello. Break bread with someone with whom you may have had a disagreement. Bridge the gap. Offer forgiveness and reconcile relationships when necessary. Friendship is a precious gift from God. Spend time with the ones you love before it is no longer an option.

SELF CARE

Happy Mother’s Day to all of the amazing mothers and to all of those who sow into the lives of young people by caring, nurturing, guiding, encouraging and lifting them up. As mothers, wives, women we typically put everyone else first and allow ourselves to be sidelined. For me, it is a blessing to take care of others, to watch them grow and flourish, however, we cannot continue to do it at the expense of our own wellness. If we are not mindful, after constantly going and doing for others, we will find ourselves utterly exhausted with no more time or energy to take care of ourselves.


I was raised to be selfless - to always think of and consider others. That somehow translated into always putting others first, and I did this for years at the cost of my own self care. I found that not actively engaging in self care led to depressed state of being. After years of self neglect, I am now being intentional about making time for what matters to me. Identifying what matters to you is very personal. It is safe to say that what matters will be different for different people. Conflict arises when others have an expectation of you to spend time doing the things that matter to them with no regard of what matters to you.


Self care is often thought of as a day at the spa or buying something nice for yourself. I believe it is a much more expansive concept than that. For me, self care is about engaging in activities and relationships that produce joy. The activities and relationships do not have to be free from struggle or conflict, but they must bring value to my life. They must build me up and not tear me down. I must feel a level of freedom as opposed to feeling as if I am in bondage. For me, that is the kind of self care that leads to a happy and fulfilling life.


Taking care of yourself does not mean that we do not still take care of others. I am a mother so my children are on the top of my priority list. Although my children are now adults, I truly wish that I had learned this self care lesson when they were much younger and I was actively raising them. I am praying that someone reading this message learns earlier than later that in order to adequately take care of others you must first take care of yourself. Self care leads to wellness, to the health of your mind, body and spirit. I raised my three girls while in a constant state of depression. I deserved much more than I allowed myself to endure. I did not take care of myself. I allowed myself to exist and not live. As a result, I was relentless in ensuring that they knew who God was and to trust Him even if I somehow fell off track. I look at them now and marvel at how in the midst of my sadness God blessed me to raise beautiful, confident women who love Him and care so deeply about others. The grace of God and His strength in the midst of my weakness will forever be my testimony.


I have done a number of things on my journey to weaving self care into the fabric of my life. First, I identified what is important to me and transitioned them into stated goals. Second, I strive to eliminate those things that hinder me from attaining those goals. Third, I strive to only engage in activities that are essential to the success of attaining my goals. Doing these things will free me to engage in the experiences that bring value, joy and peace to my life. I endeavor to spend the rest of my life spending quality time with family and friends; traveling and taking in the beauty of the world God created; significantly decreasing the number of material items I have in my possession. The tangible practices that I’ve incorporated into my life as part of my self care journey are: journaling my thoughts and experiences, gratitude journaling, daily morning devotion and prayer time, walking, purging at least 3 material things from my possession each week, and taking breaks in my day to simply breathe.


All of my life, I have consistently acquiesced to what others wanted or needed from me, oftentimes at the expense of my own happiness and peace. Sometimes I slip into old habits, but I do my level best not to do so. Taking care of yourself is not synonymous with being selfish. Self care is loving yourself and treating yourself in a manner consistent with that of someone who is important and valued.


It is my prayer that by sharing my testimony you make a commitment to take care of yourself. Don’t wait until you are broken, practicing self care in retrospect. Incorporate a self care process that works for you in your life right now. You deserve joy, peace and wellness all along your journey and I pray this is the gift you give yourself this Mother’s Day.


I love you,

Marsha Joi

RESURRECTION ISN'T RESERVED JUST FOR EASTER

I am currently in a state of mourning over what I desired my life to be. The process of mourning is visceral and difficult. I am gravely disappointed in myself for allowing fear to dictate many of the important decisions in my life. I was a seemingly functional person operating in a depressed mindset and state of being for over two decades. I went to work, I raised my children, I ran a youth ministry - I performed the essential functions to fulfill what I believed were my responsibilities. I took on the feelings of sadness and anxiety and tucked them away each day as if they were not real so that I could function. I am still dealing with the fallout and consequence of operating in this state of mind for so long.


Grief is not reserved just for the loss of life that is the result of someone physically dying, but can be applied to losing anything that meant something to you. For me, it was the loss of myself. I had lost sight of the abundant life that God promised. I was not living in that truth. In fact, I was not living at all. I came to a point where I did not recognize myself. I was utterly and completely lost. In my weakened state, I accepted and allowed things in my life that quite frankly, astonished me. I was for all intents and purposes, dead.
I remember listening to a tape of my grandfather preaching a sermon on the Valley of Dry Bones. My grandfather died before I was born, but my mother used to play old recordings of his sermons. Little did I know that the words preached then would be so impactful and relative in my life now. It is amazing to me how God gives you what you need when you need it. I was in a valley, I felt as if I was literally a pile of dry bones with no form, no skin, no breath - no life. Recalling this sermon was like God leading me to this valley and showing me these dry bones, asking me the question - “can these bones live?” He was using this scripture to talk to me about myself.



Then he said to me, “Prophesy to these bones and say to them, ‘Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord! This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones: I will make breath[a] enter you, and you will come to life. I will attach tendons to you and make flesh come upon you and cover you with skin; I will put breath in you, and you will come to life. Then you will know that I am the Lord.’”
Ezekiel 37:4-6
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The struggle continues as I battle my way to wholeness, but God literally brought me back to life. I am learning to not look back and long for something that wasn’t real. I’m learning to look at my disappointment though the lens of the Gospel. When God deliverers you from something there is a freedom and a resolve that is infused into your life.
Whatever you are dealing with, know that although there is pain and sadness, joy really does come in the morning. Morning is a different time for everyone. Allow God to do His perfecting work in you. Lean on Him to survive. Trust Him and allow him to direct your path as you move forward. God will resurrect and breathe life into your dead situation. The same grace He imparts to me He will impart to you.